bonus #sundaysatire: “Yeah, but Brexit negotiations” May retorts for 7000th time today – @whispersnewsltd

BRITISH Prime Minister Theresa May has reportedly been caught in a loop today after repeating the phrase “Brexit negotiations” for the 7,000th time in a bid to belittle her opponent Jeremy Corbyn. Speaking from a place that’s not London, May insisted to voters that Mr. Corbyn is incapable of bargaining with the EU as he’s not her, stating that she […]

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#saturdaysatire: woman who regrets voting for Trump still pretty racist – @reductress

Janet Ballard of Poughkeepsie, New York, now wishes she hadn’t voted for President Trump. However, she’s still super racist. While Ballard had somewhat opened her mind to others’ viewpoints after the election — viewpoints like “maybe we shouldn’t dump coal into streams” or “I want my children to have health insurance” — at the end of the day, she still really just […]

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#saturdaysatire: “The power of Christ compels you” screams Pope after tackling Trump to ground

REPORTS emanating from the Vatican this morning contrast greatly with the official accounts of US President Donald Trump’s first meeting with Pope Francis, WWN can confirm. The first meeting between the two leaders had been much anticipated after the Pope decried the toxic messages Trump shared on his presidential campaign, solidified by Republican budget proposals unveiled yesterday which target cuts […]

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(more) #saturdaysatire: “Again, again!” says delighted Trump after big bang sparkly flash zoom – @whispersnewsltd

“OOOOH that was a BIG one!” exclaimed a giddy Donald Trump in an adorable clip posted to YouTube showing the 45th President of the United States in his situation room, watching missiles launched from US warships in the eastern Mediterranean rain down on strategic targets in Syria. “Again, again!” cried Trump, clapping his hands together in such excitement that he barely […]

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#saturdaysatire: ‘Devil’s Advocate Boy’ statue erected on Wall Street next to ‘Fearless Girl’

Bravely staring down the financial district’s ‘Charging Bull,’ many women have found the popular ‘Fearless Girl’ statue’ on Wall Street a source of inspiration in the ongoing fight for gender equality. But this week, the conversation changed drastically as a new statue, called ‘Devil’s Advocate Boy,’ unexpectedly sprang up next to her. The bronze statue, which sort of aggressively came […]

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#saturdaysatire: local father does the weekly family shop for first time since 1997 – @WhispersNewsLTD

A TRIUMPHANT Waterford father of three and occasional husband of one was quick to dismiss rumours of international awards and praise after successfully carrying out the weekly family shop yesterday evening. Gary Boyd, took to his local supermarket for the first time since 1997 armed with an extensive list of items that when purchased and returned to the family home […]

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#saturdaysatire: New House of Cards series cancelled ‘because it can’t compete with this sh*t’ – @whispersnewsltd

STREAMING GIANT Netflix has made the decision to cancel its successful House of Cards series, citing the fact that despite an effort to create a series of compelling and dramatic events surrounding the inner workings of Washington politics and the White House, try as they might they ‘can’t compete with this shit’. The news comes as President Trump’s recent pick […]

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#saturdaysatire: mansplaining mansplaining to women

IN one the most profound misunderstandings witnessed by 21st century societies, learned men’s rights activists have consistently reached out to extremist feminazis to explain complex and often much debated opinions, issues and subjects, only to be subjected to harsh criticism. The process, dubbed ‘mansplaining’ has gotten a bad reputation, one which it does not deserve and the fact it is […]

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