How to be the perfect victim – a how-to guide for good girls

Here is a must-see guide for dealing with online abuse. Follow this. And I mean all of it; I don’t want to hear of you picking and choosing. Particularly if you’re a Woman with Opinions (™) and/ or a Good Girl (™). And if you’re not a Good Girl (™) then to hell with you anyway; you deserve all you get. Just like a Woman with Opinions (™).

Don’t feed the trolls
If you react in any way other than with silence to people threatening you, you deserve the threats. It is really very simple. Shut up and be a good girl.

Don’t be silent
If someone sets up a day of silence, this is your fault and you are stupid for suggesting it – although don’t forget you should have shut up in the first place. But given you haven’t, you must now not shut up. When you don’t shut up however, you will be ungrateful. Don’t consider suggesting that it is unfair and you can’t win either way. You brought this on yourself by making yourself public property. You asked for this, remember?

Maintain good humour throughout
In the midst of receiving up to a threat a minute, it is absolutely imperative that you not swear, speak angrily, or in any other way act with anything other than grace, and with a smile. If you lose your patience for one second, you deserve all you get for not behaving like a lady.

Engage with everyone who wants to debate with you over how you are reacting
This is crucial. The fact that your mental energy is somewhat used up by coping with the threats is immaterial; it is your duty to engage with thousands of people all asking you the same question / “challenging” you with various degrees of rudeness. You must repeat yourself over and over, and you must do so with a smile. Otherwise you are a bitch. And you deserve it.

Rest: weekwoman.

comment/ discuss/ express/ dance if you have to.