(I forgot about my #saturdaysatire for a while. It was summer time and the livin' was easy etc. Now I'm cold and bitter again so it's back. ETA: and, erm, a day early. Oh be quiet.) Reductress:
According to reports, Minnetonka resident Becca Harris was interrupted 25 times this morning when sharing her thoughts on last night’s presidential debate with her coworkers.
Witnesses report that Harris was not allowed to complete her thought upwards of two dozen times due to colleagues speaking over her.
“She’d start off calmly, making some informed contribution about the debate,” accountant Rita Moses says, “But inevitably Brad or Adam or Mike would just talk over her, or interject with things like, ‘WRONG.’”
Harris was reportedly very patient as her male collemade comments on the debate, including “candidate likability,” “3 A.M. phone calls,” and “Why wasn’t Gary Johnson on the stage? Huh? What about that?”
She was able to make some interesting comments like, “Did you notice Hillary was able to cite specific statis—“, “I actually liked her sense of hu—“, and “Lester Holt wasn’t perfect but he ha—“ among others.
“Becca’s a fine person,” colleague Adam Cornish shares. “But she just kept smiling while sharing her opinions and it’s like, why are you so over-prepared for this casual discussion? Obsessed with politics, much?”
“Yeah it was almost like she watched the debate too carefully, you know?” said Mike Lewtan.
Thousands of women across the country have reported a similar experience when conversing with male colleagues about politics, as well as with any other man about any other subject.
“Yesterday I was telling a grocery store employee what kind of apple I was looking for,” Dallas native Alyssa Weiner says. “And then he interrupted me to tell me I’m talking about the wrong apple. Like… why?”
“Sometimes my husband asks me how my day went,” San Diego resident Archana Ramgopal explains, “And then he just starts telling me about his day halfway through my story.”
Harris was reportedly unfazed by the constant interruptions.
“Becca didn’t lose her cool and trusted that people would see that she had smart and interesting things to say,” says Moses. “She’s my fucking hero. Yet somehow only 12 out of 20 people in the room agree with me.”
When asked what they thought of the constant interruptions, all men in the office said “What? We didn’t interrupt her! Who told you that?!”
Harris was visibly upset when informed of the number of interruptions.
“Did that really happen?” she asked. “At this point, I don’t even notice it anymore.”
Reductress, you're a thrill.